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Fun with Fundies (March 31, 2010)


Fun with Fundies returns this week with something to talk about. And that something to talk about is THIS GUY! Theist Roman, who recently wrote an email to the admin of The Foxhole Atheist (cheep plug), has proven himself in just one long run-on paragraph, filled with long run-on and sentences, just how crazy fundies can really be. Here is the letter:

From Theist Roman… Again!!! (Rhode Island):

“I read some of that Atheist crap, and you all line up with a bunch of vipers, that get to burn in hell, with the likes of Stalin, Hitler, and Putin smoking your Hashish pipes, and opium down there, in bed with eachother, crying Mommy, please dip your finger in water and drop it on our tongues! Please Mommy! Please! I am the Lord your God, you shall have no false Gods before, was not written by a man! Now, if you use to be christian as your crappy column reads, then you had a relationship with God and Jesus through the Holy Spirit, and you had hope! I did not make you some logical Brain Buster Jew wannabe, and God didn’t either! So, if you remember what it felt like to have access to God’s power and love through the Holy Spirit rather then a bunch of logic that never got crammed into Darwins Butthole properly like that Rubber AK-47 is crammed up yours, you probably want to rethink your poorly established footsteps away from faith, or realize that leading others to hell, is a bad idea, and a nasty sin! God has a greater faith in you Mr Alexander, then you can ever fathom, but everyday you lead someone down you crappy logic gateway, into Zeus’s butthole, you pay for it just like the jews and other sinners have, by seeking forgiveness through Christ, and then recognizing the consequences for your behavior our to be expected logically speaking, and the forgiveness given to you by God through Jesus, is not logically expected! So logically speaking, you sin, you get to burn in hell for it! But what is not logical, Mr Spalk wannabe is that God still loves you and desires to have you in heaven with Him, and his Son, and therefore washed you clean of original sin through baptism, and does forgive you for your sins allowing you to join the heavenly Brady Bunch, even after having betrayed so many of your brothers and sisters, while hoping you would be the first to get in the gates of heaven with Mohammed and get the 40 virgins, but I hate to break it to, ya, that lands you in hell, and Jesus said that in heaven you have heavenly bodies, neither male nor female! So, logical or not, the truth no matter what way you put it is that 2+2=4, and God is your heavenly Father, like it or not, Mr Spalk (he means Mr.Spock from Star Trek) and your logic crap, and Athiesm comes from the AntiChrist, the Liar, who gets to burn for eternity, so you want to play the My Drill Sergent taught me to wash my hands after I pee role, you can but in hell your pee won’t cool anybody off, so you better start making a better plan than believing in the Logic hocus pocus, and ask for forgiveness now, before you become the dog in bed with Satan, who treats your behind like its his vagina! Adios!”

Wow! So who needs therapy? I think I do after reading that. I always used to think that people could only get so stupid before the brain ceases to function all together, but this up-and-coming Fred Phelps has proven me wrong. I would usually use this point in the blog to point out any and all flawed logic involved, but I don’t think an analysis is necessary here.

Congratulations, Theist Roman. You are indeed, beyond a shadow of a doubt, BAT SHIT CRAZY!

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One comment on “Fun with Fundies (March 31, 2010)

  1. This Theist Roman is just another typical example of the weird convoluted "thinking" that goes on in the Christian mind.

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